Running On Empty

RUNNING ON EMPTY (WITH A FUEL LEAK)

 My Dad told me many times “It will all work out, you will see!”

Well his actual works to me were “It’ll all work out lad, you’ll see!” From the day he died until now, I have kept reassuring myself and my family with these words! It’s got pretty hairy at times though I can tell you!

On more than one occasion I have had to remind my Dad by telling him out loud, “I believe it will all work out like you said Dad, but I need you to step in just about now and help if you can from where you are!” It's when my overdraft is within pennies of its limit, and Anne is days away from her payday and there is less than a gallon of petrol in the tank. My Dad used to quote Mr Micawber, in the Charles Dickens book “David Copperfield” who kept saying “Something will turn up!” and let me tell you it always does!

I am not ungrateful for the miraculous provision of money in these past eight years or so, since I left my full time employment. Although we haven’t had a summer holiday since 2007 or gone to as many music gigs as we used to, our lifestyle has remained little changed in the intervening five years!

I have taken the attitude that my work is spiritual in nature and my belief that being spiritual means not being motivated by the financial rat race. Furthermore I have believed that this is what brings me peace and for this reason I have been genuinely happy to live this way and yet it has become apparent to me that it has cost my family too much and now things must change!

For the first 6 of these 8 years my wife Anne worked two jobs (a total of 51 hours a week) thank fully she only has one now which has made things a little tighter. My daughters have contributed to the family budget (as they should) but they have believed that they can’t move out (the eldest is 28 and the youngest 23) to their own accommodation because of where that would leave our household budget; this is unacceptable.

A little while ago I noticed a few spots of petrol on the ground when I filled up and over recent weeks the spots have first turned into a puddle and now it has become worse, and the filler pipe is about to be repaired or replaced. I can no longer afford to “run on empty” and so I have been examining my beliefs around money and as a result I am about to share with you my conclusions. 

I know a lot of my online friends are in a similar situation as where I now find myself, when it comes to money. I am looking forward to sharing with you how things can and will change for you as they are beginning to change for me!

Love and light to you from from Barnabas :) <3